Why Am I Doing This?

Why am I doing this?

Peter Hitchens said, ‘Everyone has a book in them, but in most cases that’s where it should stay.’.

Well, I am sure he was right, but I am letting mine out. The question is why? Of course, it’s a test, and I have always set myself tests and taken the most difficult choices deliberately. I suppose there is a book right there?

And now I am writing about writing a book. Definitely unhinged. But isn’t that part of the qualification?

It is time for some introspection. I have always adhered to the no-f***s-given philosophy, but that has started to change, which has been worrying me for some time. That is an organutan that I want to get off my back.  

I only realized I was a deep thinker a few years ago, and I’ve since been applying that skill to various problems, discovering I can accomplish most things. One of the pivotal moments was understanding the philosophy of quantum mechanics. Not that anybody ever understands it that is part of the issue.

Brian Green said’ 

‘Quantum Mechanics is different. Its weirdness is clear without comparison. It is harder to train your mind to understand quantum mechanics because it shatters our own personal, individual conception of reality.’

And that is exactly what has happened, and the book is part of that exploration. I have no idea where it will lead, but I have always loved the unexpected and the unfathomable.

I won’t tell you the title because that is part of the book. But the Preface says.

‘This is a historical novel set in northern India, spanning the period from 1880 to 1965. This period was one of significant change and suffering. The transition from two hundred years of East India Company rule to British rule, followed by partition and independence.

The narrative examines the events and their impact on various sectors of society. The British, including those born in India, such as my family, who have been there since 1789, and those who arrived more recently. The other religions, Hindu, Muslim, and Sikh, and how the role of women also changed.

Key themes include the conflicts and attitudes of Indians and the British, drawn from historical research and current perspectives from interviews with historians, eyewitnesses, and academics from various countries.

I was born in India during the 1950s and have traced my family history back to an East India Company conductor in 1789. The history will likely go further back. My family was involved in the Indian Army, the East India Company, the British and Indian Civil Services, and commercial management in tea, textiles, and finance.

My love and affection for India, its history, and its people are deep. This is a personal journey to learn more and answer many of my own questions about whether the British role was good or bad.

I know my family loved India and is confused about our history. But how did those we lived alongside really feel?

As part of this journey, I will revisit India, including Shimla, where my father and three generations of our family lived; Delhi; Kolkata; Dera Dun Military College; and our family’s tea estate in Assam. Along the way, I will talk to as many people as possible.

Please bless my work with your contributions and goodwill.

What I have found so far is that it is giving me peace. Not just the work, which is settling into a discipline, but also the research of limitless questions that lead to manydiscoveries and answers. 

Many of these have been troubling me for about 50 years, it seems. I will explore those in another blog. Wish me luck.

Yours in thought, Hezza.